Quote and a question...

"When you no longer believe that eating will save your life when you feel exhausted or overwhelmed or lonely, you will stop.  When you believe in yourself more than you believe in food, you will stop using food as if it were your only chance at not falling apart."  -- Geneen Roth  Women, Food, and God

So...are you ready to talk about this book yet?  Are you ready to let go of everything that everyone else has every told you about who you are and what you're capable of and learn to choose for yourself?

Old coping mechanisms

"When we consistently use defenses that we developed twenty  or fifty years ago, we freeze ourselves in the past.  We lose touch with reality.  We live a lie." --Geneen Roth Women, Food, and God

We definitely need past experiences to draw from -- knowing how to act the second time around based on what happened the first time is how we mature, right?

But what if our reactions to the present (being governed by our past) are holding us back?  What if we aren't looking for new and improved ways to deal with situations based on past experiences.  What if we consistently choose the same reaction, not because it worked the best in the past, but because we have used it so many times in the past. 

If this becomes the case, we never live in the present moment -- we are doomed to repeat, repeat, repeat the past -- which is great if your past is all rainbows and ponies -- but if not, wouldn't you like new results?

If you are not happy with your weight, chances are you have some coping mechanisms developed around food -- eating when you're stressed, not eating when you're stressed and then binging when the stress finally hits critical mass.  Have you ever wondered what part the food plays in all this?  It's really not the taste.  Distraction is a mild way of putting it.  In these cases, food is being used to help disconnect you from the stress -- like wrapping yourself in bubble wrap so nothing bad can get to you....for the time you're eating, anyway.

But is that how you want to deal with your stress?  Or is that just the way you have dealt with it in the past?  Are you ready to deal with your present life and learn better ways to cope -- new defenses so you don't have to live the lie?

Women Food and God....

So....did you do it?  Did you buy the book?  Are you reading right now so we can talk about it?  Not only did I buy a copy and then blog that you should buy it too because I am getting so much out of it --- I am getting so much out of it that I went down this weekend and bought another copy and gave it to a friend.  My hope is that she will read it and help her kids from following down the same path.

What makes this book so good, you ask?  My favorite part so far, you ask? 

What has struck me so far was the author's nice sized rant on how we should never underestimate our urge to bolt.  I like the word choice -- it indicates something other than a planned change of direction or a coordinated decision act in a different manner.  Bolting is like running out of the house with my hair in curlers, housecoat a-flappin', arms over my head flaylin', looking like a complete mad woman without even two brain cells to rub together.

Outside of the fact that I don't own a set of curlers (or a housecoat -- do they even make those any more?)  -- you get the image of me bolting, right?  Bolting is a reaction we use to get us back to where the world is comfortable after things get too tough on our chosen path.  Bolting back to comfortable behaviors is what we do when changing our eating (or dealing with our personal baggage) gets too hard.  We chuck off the dead-weight of our good intentions and run back to what feels comfortable (even if it is the eating behaviors that got us to our unhappy weight) housecoat a-flappin'.

So, what's the author's suggestion on dealing with the urge to bolt?  (you mean besides never underestimating the power of that urge?) --- go get the book!  Then we can talk!

Do something Friday

Months ago, a friend called to tell me she had just seen an interview with Geneen Roth about a new book she just published.  The friend told me, based on the interview, I should go down to the bookstore (right then!!) and buy this book.  (Which I didn't do because I had eight other books on my shelf to read first).

That was last March.  Since then, Oprah has read Geneen's book.  I have mentioned a client's comment about the book here.  But I still hadn't read it.

Over the course of the last couple weeks, several people have mentioned the book and last week I finally went over to Barnes and Noble and bought it. 

The title of the book is Women Food and God --an unexpected path to almost everything.

Normally, I wouldn't rave about a book -- honestly, there are only a very select number of books worth a true rave but this is one of them.  Geneen relates her story and the story of her clients in a way that is accessible to all.  Truly, the having the word women in the title should not make men this this book is not for them -- it is a story of our time -- The use of food to separate us from ourselves so we do not have to feel all of the uncomfortable feelings life is full of .

I can guarantee you will relate to this book.  It will make you think about your weight in a new way -- it underscores my repeated refrain "Weight isn't the problem -- it is a symptom of the problem".

This weekend, go out and buy this book.  Start reading it and tell me what you think -- I can't wait to read your thoughts!