Failure?...or Learning Opportunity?

I was reminded again today that coaching a client through set backs is, perhaps, one of the most important functions of my job.

How many times have you felt like you had things all figured out -- things were working -- you were losing weight-- and then life happens and you experience a set back.  Whether or not your weight starts creeping back up is not the point.  You had gotten used to feeling like you were in charge of your eating behaviors.  You liked how you were feeling when you left the table feeling light and ready to move on to the next activity.  You liked trusting yourself to make appropriate choices about what you were putting in your mouth.

And then something change...and now you are not feeling successful...at all.

Some of the weight loss literature is suggesting we should spend more time per session coaching a client for weight maintenance than we do in actually helping them lose the weight in the first place.  Now...from my perspective, that is a hard sell to clients who are feeling great about their success. 

Some of the literature is also suggesting coaches help clients reframe the idea of "failure" (i.e. gaining back some of the lost weight) into the idea of "learning opportunities".

Learning opportunities are those times when your resources have been pushed to the limits and the positive behaviors aren't sticking as well as you would like.  Learning opportunities are the times where your old behavior (you know...the ones that caused you to gain the weight in the first place) start to reassert themselves.  This is the point where the rubber meets the road. 

Please don't operate under the idea that once you feel you have it all figured out and you have hit your goal weight (or you've lost enough to start feeling really good about yourself) that it will be smooth sailing from then on out.

Plan for the bumps and bruises to your routines.  Figure out what makes you successful in losing weight right now and WRITE IT DOWN!!  Put it in a go-to envelope so when life happens and you move away from those helpful behaviors, you have a plan in place that you can implement ASALP (as soon as life permits).

It's not a failure if you pick up the pieces and work to get yourself back on course -- you will have learned how to cope with that experience.  You will be wiser and better prepared the next time life presents a Learning Opportunity.