Friday, September 16, 2011

Do something Friday

So yesterday we talked about getting untangled from other's opinions and judgments.  Sweet!  You've got that mastered now, right?  Well....maybe not but......

What about your judgments of yourself?  If I had a dime for every time I heard someone describe themselves as "bad" because of something they ate .... I would be rich, rich, RICH!!  How about you?  How many times in the last two days have you said (to yourself or someone else) that you were "bad" because of something you ate?  And on the flip side:  How many times in the last two days have you given yourself a mental high five for an eating behavior?

You are the best person to give yourself positive feedback -- mostly because you know if it was genuine (or not).  Research indicates there should be 7 positive interactions for every one negative interaction if one wants to have a flourishing relationship with another person or group of people.  (if there are never any negative interactions -- we assume that person is just blowing smoke.  And if there are more negative interactions, the quality of the relationship degrades)

I'm not sure there has every been a study that looks at ratios of interactions one has with one's self.  But I bet a similar ratio holds true.  We all need to give ourselves well-deserved credit when we behave in a positive manner and constructive criticism when we don't.

How many of us can say we are consistently good at that? for thought.

Spend some time this weekend assessing your internal dialogue.  Start a tally list -- what's your ratio?  Or maybe, a more easy version is it write down the date and time of every negative self-directed thought.  If it takes you all weekend to gather some -- hooray!  you're probably hitting a pretty solid positive/negative ratio.

But if you end up needed to write down the hour:minute:second of each negative thought to keep them straight, perhaps you have some work to do in reframing your dialogue with yourself.

First things first -- spend some time investigating what you're currently doing.  Don't assume you know!  You may be surprised at what you learn about yourself!

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