Thursday, March 11, 2010
Harnessing the Power of the Lizard
I have been giving this some thought. Per the request of a reader (I love requests by the way!), I have been doing some research on the Lizard, as in Inner Lizard or the Lizard Brain. Here is what I have learned:
First of all, the Lizard Brain, phyisologically speaking, is one of the oldest part of the brain from an evolutionary stand point. Its job are to keep us living -- its is the non-verbal part of our brain that runs on instinct and ritual. It catalogs our behaviors and their repercussions -- which ones worked (pleasurable)and which ones didn't (those that caused us pain or discomfort). It sees things in black and white -- there is no gray matter here.
This is the place that we act on emotional memories. This is the part of the brain that looks for patterns that concern our survival.
So...fast forward to the other day, when I was talking about the Inner Lizard. If you google the term, Seth Godin (who we all know I love!!) has put out a business book that talks a lot about overcoming the resistance of the Lizard. His contention is that the Lizard needs to be quieted. The Lizard is the one keeping us in our "safe" (read: known) bubble. We may not like where we are but we understand it -- it is status quo, we haven't died from it yet so it must be safe (because we aren't dead).
Because of what the Lizard is, it always looks backwards. It can't plan ahead. There are no known patterns of your future -- only your past has been proven out -- this is the knowledge base of the Lizard.
It is the Lizard that tells you your plan is doomed to fail. "You haven't lost the weight yet, why would it be different this time." Maybe you have lost the weight but it is starting to creep back on -- "Yup",your Lizard says, "of course it is. This is what happened last time, and the time before that, or the time before that..."
So what should we do with the Lizard? Duck tape his mouth shut? Put him in a coffee can? Tie him to a chair and threaten him with immediate demise should he open his mouth? Or (most terribly) live in fear of every time he opens his mouth?
I don't know what your Big Universal Truth (BUT) is but here is mine. Everything happens for a reason (I do not expect to know what that reason is most of the time). I believe in Synchronicity (the concept not the song by the Police). And I believe our bodies give us a ton of information about our internal and external environments that we can chose to listen to -- or not.
Based on my BUT, I am going to take a leap and come down on the side of making friends with the Lizard and seeing if we can harness his energy to help us get to where we want to go.
How's that work? Well, let's go back and look at what Lizzie does.
1. Runs on instinct and ritual
2. Sees things in black and white
3. Looks for and stores patterns in our past
4. He is loud and persistent
What if we started listening to Lizzie and understanding that (much like an overprotective mother)she just wants to keep us safe -- to have us not put ourselves at excessive risk. However, safe now is different than safe when mother-Lizzie grew up. There are no tigers at the ends of our driveways. We don't experience food shortages now like she did in her day -- there is no reason for us to gobble up our dinner or stuff ourselves. There will be more food available tomorrow. And just because we haven't been end-all, be-all successful yet in the weight loss department doesn't mean we will repeat our past ad infinitum (like mother-Lizzie keeps telling us).
And because the world is all about push and pull -- you can't have mother-Lizzie without having the recalcitrant teenager rebelling against everything she says. This is the part of you driven to eat the whole cake because Lizzie is encouraging it (you're sad you know -- the cake will help). The part of you that acts out by putting yourself on a very strict diet just to prove mother-Lizzie wrong.
When do parents start having a better relationship with their children? In my experience, it is when the child realized the parent does know some things and should be listened to because they can provide valuable insights and when the parent realized the child needs to make her own decisions about the life she wants to live.
The same with mother-Lizzie. She makes good sense when she pipes up that the guy in the elevator seems too creepy to ride with. But her alarmist stance about food shortages (you'd better eat that last few bites...who knows when you will get the opportunity to eat this again!) isn't serving you well.
Don't fight Lizzie. Learn to understand what she is telling about food -- BUT then take the extra step of evaluating her thoughts to see if they hold true in your day and age.
And remember -- ultimately YOU write your own future -- one decision at a time.
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